Wow, it has been awhile since I wrote. I have been busy with appointments and work and honestly thought my little man would have shown up by now....but we are still waiting....
I have been off pelvic rest for almost two weeks now even though my placenta at last sonogram moved back from marginal placenta previa to low lining again, still close to my cervix but not as bad as before. Since I am considered full term that's why they are allowing pelvic rest to be lifted and now it's just a waiting game. They will allow me to go natural. The only reason I would have to have a C-section would be if I start to bleed too much during labor.
These past two weeks have been anxiety ridden! I can not express how tired, worn out, stressed, and FULL OF ANXIETY I am each day I have to walk into work and work 10hrs. And then do that for the entire week... I am terrified my water is going to break at work.... It causes me so much pain being on my feet and doing heavy lifting that some nights I feel like Rylan is just going to fall out as I slowly walk out of the door breathing through braxton hick contractions and the painful sharp pains that come along with your cervix lightening. I have come to realize that I am strong....That what I thought I was incapable of doing, I do and exceed expectations while doing. God has taught me how strong I am and I remember he doesn't give me anything I can't handle. SOOO....If that's being humiliated if my water is to break at work, then so be it... I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me....which brings me to the scary labor pains...YEAH (taking deep breath) I can do that too...yes, yes I can...(these words are on repeat daily in my mind)
As we come closer and closer to my due date (now ten days away!) I have noticed little personality traits of Rylans. Well at least I think they are. Here are some of the things that I have come to think Rylan will be like just from spending these nine and a half months with him in my womb.
1. He is going to be jumpy like daddy (Every time I hit a box on the hard table at work and it makes a loud noise, Rylan jumps! You would think he would be used to those noises by now!)
2. He is stubborn... (hmmmmmmmmm who does he get that from........ :-D)
3. He likes his space (Again.....I have NO idea who he gets that from! ok, maybe I am the same way...just maybe :-D He doesn't like anything laying on my belly and always kicks and squirms to get it off.)
4. He may be a picky eater but he is going to take after his daddy in this area (which is a good thing.) I believe fresh foods is going to be his thing. He will occasionally like the fried foods and sweets but it wont be his first choice, I think he will choose fruit over fries :-D
5. He is going to be laid back like daddy and I but all of a sudden get super hyper like his daddy does at times. And then he will crash and sleep after hours of going crazy :-D
6. He is going to just take his time in every area, when he chooses it's his time to make a decision or he needs to start something (even if people think it should have been sooner) he will make his choices when it's good for him and he's ready (AGAIN, no idea where he gets that from! OK....I do :-D)
7. He is going to be a night owl like mommy and daddy. Not so good when we want to sleep after working ten hours but hopefully we can get him on a schedule if my prediction is right, that he will be most awake at 3am.
8. He is going to LOVE his daddy! He always starts to move a lot once Kevin starts telling a long story, he LOVES hearing daddys voice.
9. He will be easily distracted.
10. My voice will calm him and put him to sleep. (The last two go together as one night Rylan was going CRAZY in my belly! So much so I was in pain and terrified my water was just going to burst right there at work. But then I started talking to the girl I was working with and for the entire night as we worked we talked back and forth and I talked more in that night than I had all week lol. He instantly became calm and remained like that the rest of the night....
It will be amazing to hold Rylan and watch his personality traits come into play. I can't wait to see who he looks like! I want to snuggle with him and give him a million kisses! I want to apologize for all the hard work I had to put us through while I carried him, I know he hates Target too :-D However if I do go into labor and have him at work (running joke at work lol) then we (Rylan, I, and my co-workers) believe Rylan should then be branded the "Target baby" and we should collect royalties and even if it doesn't make sense to the add....he HAS to be shown in every commercial! Because they are forcing me into a box that is extremely draining me daily just to be there so I don't lose my job....It's the least they can do, right? :-D Yeah. I think YES!
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